It goes without saying that even a great life well lived can be super stressful from time to time. Balancing a high-powered career with an active family life and a full social calendar can find even the most virile among us temporarily off our game as a result and it’s not uncommon for our sex lives to be affected.
If it’s happened to you, you already know the frustration, but you should also know that it doesn’t have to be the end of the world. Here we’ll take a closer look at some of the most effective ways to get your sexual groove back when it comes to your bedroom game. We’ll also touch on some key lifestyle factors to keep an eye on in the future. You’ll be feeling more like your usual self again in no time!
1. Make sure you’re not overthinking it.
Whether or not you’re in a relationship, you probably spend more time than you should worrying about why your sex life just isn’t clicking for you if your libido is at a low point right now. You’re trying to figure out what’s wrong so you can get to the root of the problem and get back to normal. You’re also probably making the problem worse by doing exactly that.
The last thing you want to do if you’re already under stress is put too much additional pressure on yourself to have sex or be in the mood. Naturally, it’s hard not to waste energy worrying about something that’s this frustrating, but you also stand a much better chance of your libido returning naturally.
2. Don’t skip your workouts.
When you’re busy or stressed, it only makes sense to let some things fall by the wayside until you feel like you have ample time for them again. Just don’t let your workouts be one of these things. Skipping workouts and letting physical fitness slide could be hurting your sex drive in ways you don’t realize, especially if your life is currently stressful in other ways as well.
Making physical fitness a priority doesn’t take away from your potential time in the sack. It won’t sap you of precious energy either. In fact, exercise increases blood flow, preserves stamina, and triggers excellent endorphin rushes that help you feel better about life in general. It’s also about the most important thing you can do when it comes to getting and staying excited about everything your amazing body can do (sex included), so lace up those running shoes and reach for those weights.
3. Pay more attention to your diet.
Another area most people tend to cut corners when life gets hectic or stressful is nutrition. High-calorie drive-thru fare and extra-large portions may make you feel more satisfied in the moment, but they definitely take their toll eventually – especially at night when you’re most likely to have opportunities to get frisky. Instead of amorous, you wind up feeling bloated, dehydrated, and just sick all around. Your problems only escalate if bad habits eventually lead to weight gain and poor self-image.
Make sure you’re sticking to a healthy diet characterized by healthful portions packed with lean protein, fresh produce, and whole grains. You may also want to consider adding foods to your diet that are linked to better sex, and improved libido. Examples include:
- Dark Chocolate: When you’re falling in love or otherwise really attracted to a potential sex partner, your brain releases a particular endorphin called phenylethylamine. Consuming dark chocolate in healthful amounts can produce a similar effect.
- Nuts: Nuts like peanuts, almonds, and walnuts contain amino acids that assist the brain when it comes to keeping important neurotransmitters circulating. They’re fantastic for improving sexual response for that reason.
- Seafood: You’ve probably already heard of oysters being a known aphrodisiac. What you may not be aware of is that additional seafood options like lobster, shrimp, crab, and mussels can produce a similar effect thanks to high levels of nutrients like zinc, copper, and high quality protein.
- Chili Peppers: Spicy foods like hot chilis help stimulate blood flow and rev up your metabolism. Many people also swear by them as ways to achieve harder erections, stronger orgasms, and more satisfying sexual experiences overall.
4. Change the subject when it comes to conversation.
Whether or not you’re currently in a relationship, it’s important to think sexy and talk sexy if you’re serious about getting your libido back to normal. After all, you’re exponentially less likely to wind up naked in bed at night if you spend your days griping about your boss or going over the same mundane topics for the millionth time.
If you’re already in a relationship, make sure everyday conversations about who’s going to pick up the kids or call the plumber in the morning are interspersed with some flirty texts or comments. Try randomly reminding them of a really sexy encounter from the past or sending a sassy selfie for no particular reason.
The point is to remind both of you that you’re sexual beings and not just grown adults with responsibilities.
If you’re not single, try indulging in some flirty conversation with a hot stranger over the Internet or through a dating app instead of checking the news the next time you have a few free minutes. The more you talk about sex, the more likely you’ll be to feel like having it. Services specifically for hooking up are especially good to try.
5. Treat yourself to an indulgent solo session.
Many people tend to think of masturbating as being akin to scratching an itch, as opposed to something to treat themselves to, and they really shouldn’t. Self-pleasure can actually work wonders if you’re struggling with your libido or simply feeling off your game sexually. It helps stimulate blood flow to your genitals, as well as flood the body with much-needed endorphins. It helps improve orgasmic response in both men and women as well.
Plus – as with any other type of sexual activity – the more you do it, the more you’ll want to do it. Try masturbating with a sex toy for a change or trying a new type of porn to help yourself get good and excited. Again, sexy online chat with someone that really gets your motor running can be helpful in this regard as well.
6. Add something new to your sexual repertoire.
Speaking of trying new things, sometimes mixing things up in the bedroom is just what the doctor ordered when it comes to getting your sexual groove back. If you have a regular sexual partner, consider sitting down together and trading sexual fantasies you’ve always wanted to try. Then decide on a few that you’d both like to try in real life.
Many couples also find it helpful to break some entirely new ground together. Think roleplay, light bondage, or play that involves sex toys! Still more couples discover that they’re both interested in options like threesomes, mate-swapping, or even just giving an open relationship a try. So long as both of you are comfortable with the options you decide on and no one’s being hurt in the process, anything’s fair game. Be creative!
7. Inject new life into your look.
When it comes to looks that absolutely scream “sexy”, both men and women alike seem to gravitate toward options they think potential sex partners will like. What they should be doing is revamping their look to include more things that make them feel sexy. At the end of the day, it’s not going to matter how much the hot girl you’re trying to date likes man buns or leather pants if they make you feel ridiculous.
Instead of defaulting to what you think someone else would like on you, decide what makes you feel like a million bucks from a sexual standpoint and go for that instead. You’ll feel sexier, think sexier, and act sexier both in and out of the bedroom.
8. Get some much needed R&R.
As touched on above, stress can be one of the biggest mood killers when it comes to a person’s sex life. That said, one of the most effective ways to get your sexual groove back would be to look for ways you can remove stress from your life. Has your boss been really breathing down your neck lately? Maybe it’s time to cash in those vacation days and take a break if you can. Family life weighing you down? Arrange for your parents to take the kids for the weekend and treat yourself to a trip out of town.
You’ll also want to make sure you’re sleeping enough, as it’s essential to a healthy sex drive. If you’ve been sleep-deprived lately, make it a point to go to bed early for a few nights in a row. Even grabbing a quick cat nap when you can works wonders! So does taking the time to make your sleeping area quieter, darker, and more comfortable overall.
At the end of the day, a healthy sex drive is something that can’t be taken for granted. It needs to be nurtured and maintained to the same extent as any other important bodily function. Get started today!