Gay Porn: “Good Idea” or “More Harmful Than Helpful”?

These days, porn isn’t really the dirty little secret it used to be back in the day. Now, people not only enjoy it, but it’s not uncommon for them to talk about it or openly express their interest in it. This is no less the case with gay porn than any other kind. In fact, if you’re a guy, gay or otherwise, you’ve probably not only watched porn at some point, but used it as a masturbation aid. If you’re like most guys, you do so on a regular basis regardless of whether or not you’re dating other guys at the time.

But is watching gay porn really a good idea? You’ve probably heard there are mental and physical benefits to it, but you’ve most likely heard a thing or two about how harmful it can be as well. So which is it? Here we’ll take a closer look at the pros and cons of indulging in a little gay porn now and then. Does it help, hurt, or something in between?

1. Gay porn can be really educational for the uninitiated.

For lots of people, gay porn is a lot more than just something to look at when you’re horny, feel like getting off and can’t exactly go cruising for real sex. For lots of guys, especially those that came of age before the internet was part of everyday life, their first time watching gay porn was also their first time watching two men have sex or otherwise be intimate with each other. Many gay men felt their sexual identity falling into place for the first time at that point as well.

That said, gay porn continues to serve an educational purpose for young gay men, not to mention older men that may just be discovering their sexuality for the first time. They may not feel they can ask their family members, their mentors, or even their friends many of the questions they have about sex. Porn can tell them a lot of what they want to know about what two men really do like to do together.

2. Porn is a safe, private way to explore what you’re into.

Gay men aren’t any different from straight men in that they might not feel 100% comfortable talking openly about every single sexual thought they might have, even if they’re also out and proud. Lots of people have fetishes or sexual topics that they’re really curious about, but would rather not be judged by their partner or their social circles.

Watching porn in the privacy of your own home can be a safe, wonderful way to explore how you really feel about certain sex acts or types candidate, you settled down and built a life together with the understanding that what you had was gay man bdsm“forever” – full stop. However, these days you’re free to pursue romantic candidate, you settled down and built a life together with the understanding that what you had was “forever” – full stop. However, these days you’re free to pursue romantic connections for whatever reasons feel right to you. connections for whatever reasons feel right to you. of play without any fear of judgment. If you later decide you’d like to share what you’ve learned about yourself with a sex partner, that’s up to you, but it’s ultimately no one’s business what you decide to look at or think about in private. Lots of people decide they’d rather keep their fetishes to themselves and that’s perfectly OK.

Although we’re hardly knocking the benefits of enjoying some really excellent gay porn on your own, don’t make the mistake of thinking it’s strictly for solo use. As touched on above, most guys watch porn fairly regularly, so it makes sense that two guys that are sexually involved might also like watching it together.

3. Gay porn can be a fun, exciting way to spice up your sex life.

Whether you’re in a long-term relationship or are just getting to know a guy you met on Grindr for the first time, watching porn together can be a great way to spice things up or get things going. It’s also a great way to open up a candidate, you settled down and built a life together with the understanding that what you had was “forever” – full stop.

However, these days you’re free to pursue romantic connections for whatever reasons feel right to you. dialogue about something you might want to try in bed to see how your play partner feels about it. Not totally into watching together? Sharing clips you really liked for your partner to check out at their leisure can be really helpful in this department as well.

4. Porn can drive wedges between people if they’re not careful though.

Of course, there are situations where introducing videos of gay sex into the mix might hurt more than it helps. Let’s say for example that one partner is really into something specific that the other partner happens to find really off-putting and repellent. The partner that isn’t into it is really only human and might find it hard not to judge even if they’re determined not to.

Alternatively, some people have a lot of trouble dealing with sexual problems head-on and can use porn as a way to avoid it. They may develop a habit of consistently turning to porn instead of a partner when they’re looking for a sexual release or start indulging in it compulsively to the point where it negatively impacts their sex life in other ways. It’s up to every person to discern whether or not porn is a good fit for their situation for that reason.

5. Gay porn can exacerbate body image issues in some men.

In the wide, wonderful world of porn, or even on apps like Grindr, you rarely to never see guys that aren’t blessed with perfect bodies and impossibly huge cocks. It can be all too easy to wind up with the impression that you’re not attractive, desirable, or good at sex because yours measures in at 5-6 inches instead of a mind-blowing 10-11. Alternatively, maybe you’re perfectly fine with your size, but your partner isn’t fine with his. Too much lusting after a porn star’s crazy-huge package on your part and your guy could wind up feeling woefully inadequate!

Whether it’s you or your partner that can sometimes feel a little body-conscious from time to time, keep in mind that good things really do come in all sizes. Just as there are plenty of straight guys out there that prefer small-breasted women or curvier women there are gay guys out there that more than appreciate a 5-inch penis or a guy that doesn’t necessarily look like he spends his entire life at the gym.

6. Pporn can literally be good for your health.

We’re definitely no longer living in the dark ages. Most sex experts today can agree that masturbation not only isn’t bad for you, but it can actually make you healthier in many ways. For instance, there’s a lot of evidence to suggest masturbation helps lower your chances of developing diabetes, prostate cancer, and cystitis. It’s also fantastic for improving sperm motility and boosting your mood.

two gay men watching an adult movieMasturbating and watching porn can actually make you a better lover as well. To begin with, practice makes perfect when it comes to overcoming issues like premature ejaculation. Porn can be helpful when it comes to discovering new techniques, boosting your understanding of how different guys’ bodies might work, and developing a sense of comfort with your sexual self as well.

7. Gay porn can give some men unrealistic expectations when it comes to sex.

Most grown adults totally understand that not everything they see on TV or at the movies is 100% representative of reality. However, some people never really seem to get the memo and simply take it for granted that movies and real life are more or less the same. The thing is it’s hardly uncommon for a movie to be a way for people to indulge in a little bit of wish fulfillment and/or escapism. This is no less the case with a good porno than it is The Fast and the Furious.

We’ve gone over the fact that not every man is packing the human equivalent of a fire hose in his jeans. Not every guy is going to cum buckets every time you rock his world either. In fact, there are a lot of things about porn that boil down to sheer fantasy when it comes right down to it. Yes, porn clips can be excellent learning tools if you’re new to gay sex. Just understand that real life isn’t always going to play out the same way and you’ll be just fine.

8. Porn isn’t inherently good or bad. It’s all about how you approach it.

Gay porn is like a lot of interesting, fascinating things in life. It’s not inherently good or bad in and of itself. There’s no right answer as to whether or not it should be part of your own repertoire for that reason. For lots of folks, it’s something very positive that can really change their sex lives and their sexual self-images as gay men for the better. For others, it’s just not that helpful or even appealing.

A given person’s approach to it ultimately makes or breaks the experience. Gay porn can help a guy work through his frustrations, insecurities, and hang-ups or it can exacerbate them. It can bring playmates and committed partners closer together or it can drive them apart. At the end of the day, it really is all about us and what we choose to make of it.

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Rob West

Rob West

I worked with Matt to build several hookup apps for gay men, including Guyhop.

I've been in the scene for several years now. Eternally single until I find "him".

My background is in marketing and psychology, which gives me a unique perspective on the LGBTQ dating and hookup scene.

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