Whether you openly admit it or not, you probably really enjoy watching porn and it’s not hard to see why. It’s natural and normal to enjoy watching other people have sex. It’s a fun and exciting way to enhance masturbation sessions. And it’s a great way to satisfy your curiosity as far as the logistics of various sex acts as well.
When you’re doing things on your own, porn fits naturally into the way you express yourself sexually… but what happens when you’re not? Does porn actually have a place in your life when you also have sex partners to consider? We firmly believe that it does, but knowing that is one thing. Successfully integrating it into the mix in a way that doesn’t hurt others involved is another. Even partners in open relationships can be bothered by things like porn if they’re handled the wrong way.
Here we’ll go over some of the ways watching porn can actually make a sexual relationship stronger. We’ll also give you some pointers as to the best way to go about enjoying both porn and your relationship successfully.
5 Reasons People in Relationships Should Watch Porn
The days when porn was seen as being only for reclusive perverts and lonely people that can’t get laid in real life are over. People are a lot more progressive here in the 21st century. Many experts even believe open-mindedness when it comes to porn is good for you, whether or not you’re in a relationship. This is especially the case when it comes to porn that shows both parties deriving pleasure and enjoyment from the acts. The following are just a few to consider.
1. Porn is excellent for learning new positions.
While the average porn clip is definitely chock full of positions designed solely with the camera in mind, it’s still a great way to get some serious inspiration. Feel like you and your partner have fallen into a sex rut lately? Check out some of the more creative moves in your favorite porn films and make a note of the ones you think wouldn’t be a problem for you logistically.
Naturally not all of us have the physical strength to lift our partners completely off the ground and slam them against the nearest wall for a good hammering. However, we’re all certainly capable of using furniture, pillows, and other props to our advantage. Porn can give you some great ideas for new locations to have sex as well.
2. Watching porn together makes for excellent foreplay.
Another commonly held misconception about porn is that it’s something only men are into. In actuality, women enjoy porn and are just as likely to watch it as men. They’re just less likely to speak openly about it. That said, if you’re lucky enough to have a partner that’s comfortable watching porn with you, know that watching it together makes for excellent foreplay.
Don’t just spend the entire time you’re both watching staring at the screen either. Take note of how your partner is reacting to everything going on and encourage open conversation about anything that’s especially got their interest. Many couples even enjoy acting out some of what’s going on as they watch, so don’t be afraid to see where the moment takes you.
3. Porn allows you to explore kinks you’re curious about.
All of us have kinks. We’re well aware of some, but probably have yet to discover others. Still more often, there may be certain acts or scenarios we’re really curious about, but haven’t actually tried and don’t know all that much about. Porn can be a great way to determine whether or not that threesome or BDSM session on your bucket list is something you’d be into in reality or better enjoyed as fantasy material.
Exploring porn together with a social sex partner is a great way to open up discussions about all sorts of things as well. You’ll both learn a lot about where each of you stands when it comes to the adventurous factor. Plus, you might find that your partner is more open to exploring your fantasies with you than you think.
4. Even bad porn adds amusement and laughter to the mix.
Numerous studies show that even people in committed relationships usually masturbate on the regular – up to 72% of men and 68% of women. Masturbation is a normal, healthy part of anyone’s sexual expression. It’s also a terrific stress reliever. The same thing goes for laughter.
That’s exactly why there are so many porn movies out there that are obviously designed with amusement in mind. You’re actually supposed to be laughing fit to burst at Ass Ventura or Ten Inch Ninja Turtles, just in case it wasn’t already obvious. That said, such movies often make for a great double-play when it comes to stress relief, either alone or with someone else. You can soak in the enjoyment of watching the sex acts while also laughing at the comedic elements.
5. Porn can lead to new levels of honesty and openness in a relationship.
Whether or not you and your sex partner decide porn is something you’d like to add to your sexual repertoire together, it definitely paves the way for plenty of honest conversation. It can also help both of you cultivate minds that are freer and more open – a good thing any way you look at it.
Not only will you learn more about yourself as a sexual being as far as what you like and don’t like, but you’ll become more tolerant of people that are different from you as well. You discover that even the wildest fetishes and kinks are really no big deal. At the end of the day, we’re all just people.
5 Tips for Discussing Porn with a Partner
Deciding you’d like to be more open about porn in general and perhaps ultimately make it part of your sexual relationship with someone else is easy. Successfully doing it in a way that’s not awkward or potentially offensive is another. Here are a few tips for making sure everything goes as planned.
1. Be transparent about your interest.
You don’t need to make an announcement every single time you’re in the mood to pleasure yourself to a good blow job video, but it’s a good idea to be relatively transparent about your interest in porn. Don’t pretend you don’t watch it or lie about it if asked. If you’d need a partner for that… check out this adult finder service (just in case)!
You’re no longer a 14-year-old living at home that needs to treat masturbation like a dirty secret you need to keep at all costs. The first step to building a connection where your ideas and desires are respected is to learn to be open about them.
2. Have a “no judgment” policy for difficult conversations.
At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter if you’re male or female. No one has an easy time talking about a sensitive or difficult topic when they’re constantly worried about being judged or criticized. That goes for both your partner and you.
Start discussions about sex, porn, or anything else really personal by establishing a conversational safe zone first. No judgement, no criticism, and no worry about unintentionally stepping on a conversational landmine! People just communicate better and make more progress when they know it’s okay to talk 100% freely.
3. Keep conversations personal, not general.
When discussing what each of you does or doesn’t like when it comes to sex or porn, it’s important to discuss you personally as individuals. Many people tend to make generalized statements about what all or most men and women are like 
and wonder why the other person shuts down immediately or gets offended. It’s way too easy for such statements to be seen as criticisms to be taken personally.
Don’t bring other people into the conversation at all. This isn’t about what all men or women are like in the bedroom or what they think of porn. This is about each of you as individuals, as well as your relationship to one another.
4. Focus on “ethical porn” for best results.
Many people that take issue with porn, especially when it comes to their sex partner liking it, feel it objectifies the people in it (especially the women). However, a lot of porn is quite ethical in nature, focusing on real people enjoying genuine pleasure together.
This is the best type of porn to focus on when talking to a partner about its benefits. It’s ultimately going to be the most useful and educational for you as well.
5. Strike a balance that works for both of you.
While it’s great if you and your partner want to actually watch porn together, it’s not the only way to go about things. Some people find that a little too awkward, but are open to using things they watch separately as inspiration in the bedroom or conversation starters.
Try asking your adult dating partner to send you clips of things they’d like to try in bed or for suggestions on intimate attire. Use category selections on porn websites to talk through things like specific acts, kinks, and fetishes. Or get ideas from looking at sex profiles on adult dating sites. Lastly, play things by ear in a way that feels comfortable to both of you. At the end of the day, what matters most is what works for each of you as individuals.
