As with sex, dating isn’t always easy for the average guy. It can be hard to figure out what’s what as far as all the different social games people play when it comes to the dating scene.
And to complicate matters even further, things are constantly changing, making it even tougher to figure out where you stand with women.
Debunking some of the more persistent dating myths about what women really want can help get you started in the right direction, though.
Here are a few that still hold many guys back when it comes to dating. Are you one of them?
1. Short guys never get the girl
Don’t worry. We’re not about to claim that the dating bias toward taller men doesn’t exist. It does, and yes, it’s a potential obstacle to be overcome. But no man should take it to mean that short men are just plain out of luck when it comes to winning women over.
Ultimately, successful dating is about making a deeper connection with someone, especially for women. A short guy who’s great at doing this not only has a shot with the women he wants to date, but he may even have the edge over lots of taller guys if he’s good enough at it.
The reason women like tall men in the first place really isn’t anything to do with height itself. It’s about how being with a taller man makes them feel about themselves – safe, delicate, and feminine in all the right ways. But there are lots of ways to make a woman feel this way, so it’s time to embrace them.
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2. The man should pay without exception
As with the whole height myth, it’s not that there aren’t women out there who do want and expect the man to pay for their dates, especially at first. There are. However, that’s not the case for all (or even most) women these days, so it’s important to take things on a case-by-case basis.
There are many women out there who are proud of being independent and of not needing or expecting their dates to pay their way.
There are also quite a few who feel paying their own way eliminates the possibility that their dates may feel they’re now owed something in exchange for the date.
So, by all means, offer to pay – especially if the date was your idea. But don’t fight your date on paying for her own share if that’s what she wants to do. She’s not testing you to see if you fight her on it, and forcing the issue could spoil an otherwise great connection.
3. Only handsome guys succeed at dating
Looks tend to carry a lot of weight for men when it comes to the dating game, so they naturally assume women are invested in a man’s looks to the same extent. However, while it’s unfair to say looks don’t matter to women at all, they likely matter a lot less than you think they do.
In fact, looks aren’t even on the average woman’s personal list of most desired traits.
So, what is more important to women than looks? Intelligence and a good education are way up there toward the top of the list. So are confidence, kindness, and a supportive nature. In other words, women are a lot more concerned with whether you’re a good guy than they are with your looks.
4. Calling the next day makes a guy look desperate
Pretty much every man has heard this myth before – that following up with a woman after a great date is a bad thing. The general idea is that it makes a man look desperate, like he’s trying too hard to be picked, or like he doesn’t have enough to do with his time.
In actuality, though, most women hate this because they automatically think you’re not following up because of something they did wrong. Especially in a day and age that find people ghosting others almost as a rule. They assume that, at best, you’re just not interested and can’t be bothered to tell her.
There’s also a good chance that you could ruin the previously great impression you made altogether. So if you really hit it off with a woman and had an incredible time with her, trust that she does want to hear from you and follow up right away.
Ultimately, men can avoid a lot of dating woes by simply being good, down-to-earth guys. Be comfortable in your own skin and carry yourself with confidence. Listen to your date, treat her with kindness and respect, follow up with her sooner rather than later if you have a good time, and it’s only a matter of time before you find a terrific partner.