Hooking Up with a Coworker: Hot Idea or Recipe for Disaster?

If you’ve ever been employed, chances are you’ve probably also thought about hooking up with a coworker a time or two and it’s not hard to understand why. Most people spend at least half of their waking hours at work every day, so not only do they interact with the same people over and over again, but they wind up getting to know many of them as well as they know anyone they live with.

It’s hardly uncommon to become so close with a favorite coworker that sex seems inevitable under circumstances like that. But is actually crossing that line ever a good idea?

Here we’ll go over everything you need to know about getting down and dirty with a coworker including when you should consider it, when you shouldn’t, and how you should handle things if you decide to go for it.

Why Is Sleeping with a Coworker Such a No-No?

Man and woman flirting at work

We’re nearly 20 years into the 21st century at this point, so sometimes it seems like we should be a lot more comfortable with coworkers liking to get it on every so often than we actually are… so why aren’t we?

While some people are mature enough and professional enough to mix sex and work successfully, there are far too many people that aren’t. In fact, sex between coworkers still packs so much potential for trouble that many companies expect one of the two people to quit once it’s known that they have a romantic or sexual relationship. Here’s why.

  • It’s hard for many people to focus on their job when they’ve got sex on the brain all day instead.
  • If things go wrong, they can go really wrong to the point where those two people can’t even work together anymore.
  • In cases where a superior is having sex with an employee, potential favoritism can be a problem.

A Look at the Pros and Cons

Of course, having sex with a coworker isn’t always a bad decision, especially for you personally. It can be a risky one though, so make sure you’re fully aware of the pros and cons before you take the plunge. They’re more closely related than you might think.

You’re finally excited to go to work.

Let’s face it. Going to work is really kind of a drag for most of us, so any reason to feel a little more upbeat about it is usually welcome. When you’re banging the office hottie (or hoping to), it makes sense that you’ll also look forward to seeing her every day – definitely one way to put a little pep in your step when you’re on your way to the office.

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Just don’t let it affect your ability to focus on your actual job. Otherwise, you could find yourself being passed over for important opportunities like promotions and raises.

Having a naughty secret is fun.

Couple hooking up on floor in office

There’s just something about sex that you know you really shouldn’t be having that makes it extra hot, up to and including intra-office sex. Having a dirty little secret can definitely be a mood booster. However, secrets usually have consequences should they get out.

Naturally you don’t want to lose your job, jeopardize your professional future, or ruin anyone’s marriage (if either of you is married), so make sure you’re both equipped to handle the potential fallout before you jump into the sack together.

You get major bragging rights.

Coworkers talk about one another. They discuss who’s going places and who’s really screwing up when it comes to actual work. They gather around the water cooler and chat about who else in the office they think is hot as well.

Being able to actually say you hit it with someone everyone else at your office is fantasizing about is a massive ego booster. On the other hand, talking about private matters can inadvertently start drama you’d rather avoid, especially at work.

It could actually go somewhere.

Sometimes coworkers are strictly interested in sex, so finally coming together is pretty much all about hooking up. Every so often though, raw animal attraction and a couple of red hot rolls in the hay wind up evolving into something more.

If your hook-up partner turns out to be really special, you may even decide they’re more important than your job. After all, you’ll probably have lots of jobs over the course of your lifetime, but a soulmate is forever, right? Well… maybe. Just keep in mind that nasty break-ups and rough patches between coworkers tend to go extra badly, sometimes in ways you never could have predicted.

How to Make Sure It’s Not a Disaster

So let’s say you’ve decided. Sex with a coworker is just too appealing to say “no” to and you’re going ahead with it at the earliest opportunity. The following pointers can help you make sure it’s everything you hoped it would be.

Keep it on the DL.

Couple having sex in bathroom

Remember what we said about how gossipy most offices tend to be.Rumors and talk spread incredibly fast, so you’ll want to resist the urge to brag too much about what’s going on. Flirt discreetly and limit your sexy in-office interactions to situations where you’re 100% positive you won’t get caught.

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Exercise caution with one-night stands.

Sometimes you’re not interested in having a fling with a coworker so much as you’re just looking for a red hot one-night stand. Just keep in mind that office one-night stands aren’t like regular one-nighters, so it’s probably best not to partake on a whim. You won’t be going at it all night and then parting ways for good over a fast food breakfast sandwich the next morning. You’ll have to see that person again every single time you punch in, so make sure you can handle that.

Stagger your arrival times.

Speaking of keeping things discreet, you don’t want to work hard at keeping things on the DL only to blow your cover by arriving back to work at the same time. Don’t simply assume that no one’s going to notice if you suddenly start carpooling to and from work together on a regular basis or coming back from lunch at the exact same time. They absolutely will and they’ll definitely assume it’s because you’re secretly sleeping together.

Keep your expectations in check.

Office hookups definitely come alongside a certain mystique, but don’t let your expectations run away with you. That hottie from down the hall you’ve been dreaming about is still just a person at the end of the day. They’re going to get on your nerves sometimes, just like anyone else you’ve ever hooked up with. They’re also probably going to be different as an actual person than you’re imagining right now, so keep that in mind.

Last but definitely not least, you’ll want to go into things with a light-hearted attitude to the greatest extent possible. (Think of it as a different take on “friends with benefits”.) Fun is the name of the game when you’re hooking up with a coworker. It’s hot, it’s sexy, and it’s a great way to actually live out some of your favorite pet fantasies in living color. Instead of taking things super seriously, just relax and enjoy the ride for everything that it is.

Matt Manes

Matt Manes

I am the original creator of the Mixxxer hookup app which became one of the most popular hookup services on the web.

Over the years, I've observed and learned a great deal about what works and what doesn't when it comes to dating and hooking up online.

While most guys learn through trial and error, I learned through analyzing the data from the millions of Mixxxer members we catered too.