There’s definitely a lot to love about online dating, especially if you’re a guy that’s still playing the field. Instead of trying to find the energy to hit the club or the bars after a long work week, you can simply log on and get to know as many new women as you like whenever you have a moment. Plus, you can cut right to the chase online and easily find gorgeous, vivacious women that want the same things you do whether that’s a serious relationship, a friends with benefits connection, or just plain social sex.
There’s only one thing that can throw a wrench in the machine – the possibility that the smoking hot chick who seems too good to be true actually is. And you’re right to be worried about that because statistics show that around 80% of all dating profiles contain at least one lie. So how honest is the average woman on her dating profile? Are free sex sites offering dating services reliable? Are other men worried about the same things you are? How can you tell the difference and lower your own chances of being lied to?
Here we’ll go over the most common things men worry women are lying about. We’ll touch on a few tells you can watch for if you doubt a given person’s honesty at any point as well.
Collectively, men are worried about a lot of things as far the women they flirt with online, but looks top the list by a whopping landslide. It’s not necessarily that they think the pictures on a woman’s profile aren’t actually of her. They’re more worried that mega-hot photo they can’t stop drooling over was actually taken five years and a hundred pounds ago.
There are a few dead giveaways that suggest a woman feels she has something to hide as far as what she looks like. If she only posts pictures of her face, it could well mean she either doesn’t have a nice body or doesn’t like the body she has. Photos that seem blurry, dated, or otherwise out of synch with the modern age are also more likely to be old.
Most men clearly remember their own mothers and grandmothers either refusing to share their ages or consistently fudging the real number. They’ve probably also seen plenty of female friends or girlfriends do the same over the years, so it makes sense that they’d worry about it when scoping out potential dates or hook-ups online.
That fact of the matter is women and men both lie about their age, but not as drastically as you’d figure. Although there are certainly exceptions, most people only fudge the numbers by an average of a couple of years. If you do think something’s off about her photos though, she could be trying to cover up the fact that she’s a lot older than she says on her profile.
- Independence Level
A modern woman wants to be seen as fiercely independent and strong. She probably wants this even if deep down she’s anything but. Naturally, a lot of men worry about signing up for a no-strings-attached relationship with what seems like an easygoing, independent chica only to wind up stuck with a clingy mess of a person on their hands instead.
Women that are truly independent and “up for anything” just take it as a given and don’t usually feel the need to over-emphasize it on their dating profiles, especially if they’re only looking for a casual fling. Tread carefully if someone specific seems like she’s going out of her way to state, re-state, and re-state yet again how “totally not clingy” she is.
- Success Level
Men are actually a lot more likely to lie about how successful they are, but women definitely do it from time to time as well. Even if she’s not yet successful, a woman still probably wants to come across as a person of value and may go out of her way to project high aspirations, lofty goals, and a driven professional nature.
This isn’t a potential lie you need to worry about in most instances though. Women are actually far more likely to lie about their appearance or how easygoing they are. In fact, there are even statistics out there that suggest men are worried about this one because it’s something they themselves have lied about on their own profile.
- Dating Goals
Both males and females can usually tell you at least one story about a hook-up buddy they had once that suddenly wound up wanting a lot more after a couple of months. That said, it’s understandable to find yourself wondering whether or not that really hot, really fun girl is only telling you what she thinks you want to hear when she says she isn’t looking for anything serious.
It can be tough to really put a finger on whether or not people are lying about something like this, as it’s very likely they don’t realize they are lying. Also, someone can start out wanting one thing but wind up wanting something completely different further on down the line. You can raise your chances of meeting like-minded women by sticking to interfaces like Mixxxer though – interfaces that are all about casual hook-ups and flirty fun. The women you’ll meet are much more likely to be there because they’re tired of the exact same things you are.
- Highbrow Taste in Media
Let’s face it. We all worry about how a potential sex partner or dating interest might perceive our undying love for The Three Stooges or the fact that we secretly read Twilight and loved it. A woman is just as likely to do this as a man is. She really is worried that you won’t think she’s sexy or interesting anymore if you know Real Housewives of Atlanta is her favorite show or that her all-time favorite book is actually Harry Potter and not Anna Karenina.
People just really want to be liked and quite a few think appearing smart or cultured on an unlikely level is the way to do that. It’s actually relatively easy to determine whether or not someone’s telling the truth about something they’re allegedly really into though. If you are a big enough Johann Sebastian Bach fan that you can’t hang with someone who isn’t, just attempt to start a conversation with the person about it. If they can’t talk about whatever it is with ease, you’ve got your answer.
- Interest in Sports
If you secretly dream of hooking up with a woman that loves sports as much as you do, you’re not alone. Most guys fantasize about finding someone that loves all the same things he does. However, a lifetime of dating women that complained every time they wanted to watch a big game can make a man suspicious of any woman that can’t stop talking about how much she loves football.
Again, if a given woman seems like she’s “trying too hard” to bring up her love for a given sport, it’s a red flag. This is especially the case if she already knows that’s a huge passion of yours. If a girl says she loves a specific team or talks with authority about favorite players though, she’s probably on the up and up.
We all know at least one person that claims to love traveling even though they haven’t been on a real trip in five years or more. They’re probably hoping to appear adventurous, independent, and well-rounded. If the person’s not terribly self-aware, they may even actually see themselves that way.
If this is the sort of thing that matters to you, it’s easy to expose a liar. Real adventurers travel so much that it’s practically a lifestyle. They also typically have photos to back up what they’re saying. If a given girl is trying really hard to convince you that she’s the female Indiana Jones but her social media feeds and profiles don’t reflect that, she’s probably not being 100% honest.
Tips for Detecting a Lie
If you suspect someone you’re interested in isn’t being completely honest with you, either in general or about something specific, keep an eye out for the following behaviors. They can indicate someone’s fudging the truth, if not outright lying.
- The person goes out of their way to over-emphasize or repeat something in particular.
- They try to change the subject when you ask them questions about something specific or else they hedge on their answers.
- When telling personal stories, they switch from past to present tense a lot or fail to use personal pronouns to refer to themselves within the context of the story.
- You just “have a feeling” something’s not right. Such feelings have a way of being correct.
You can also get right to the bottom of things by asking to switch from email to phone or Skype if something seems off about their messages. If you’re not sure they are who they say they are, you can ask them for real-time photos. You get the picture. As an example, many users on the sex site Mixxxer post photos of themselves and a recent magazine or publication to prove it’s a current photo.