At this point, we all probably have several female Facebook friends that complain almost constantly about the number of unsolicited dick pics and overly salacious messages they receive from various dudes. Plus, there always seems to be another story hitting the news about some politician or other professional that landed himself in hot water because he sent someone some naughty texts that he shouldn’t have.
Naturally, that leaves the male population at large wondering about sexting as a concept. Are sexts and naughty pictures ever a good idea? Do women ever actually enjoy receiving them and, if so, do they actually get turned on by what they see? If they do like sexts, what separates a sext that’s totally hot from one that’s a complete flop? Let’s take a closer look at the answers to these questions and more.
Are There Women That Enjoy Receiving Sexts?
The short answer to that question is “yes”. However, it’s important to realize that sexting is like anything else worthwhile in life. It’s a fine art that requires skill and some solid instincts when it comes to what you’re doing. You can’t just feverishly tap out a string of dirty words, send them to any random woman you find attractive, and expect a good result.
The same can be said for dirty pictures, including the ever-controversial dick pic. Yes, some women like receiving them. Some even get pretty hot and bothered by them. Again though, it can’t be just any random pic sent to any woman under any set of circumstances. There’s a right way and a wrong way to go about things.
The Right Way to Go About Sexting
Now that we’re established that there’s definitely a way to approach sexting that women actually enjoy, it’s time to go over what that way entails. Make sure you keep the following principles in mind to increase your chances of a successful interaction.
- Choose who you’re sexting with care.
Here’s the thing. Most women really don’t want to be surprised with a sext completely out of nowhere. Definitely do not sext random women you don’t know unless you have a very good reason to feel it would be welcome (i.e. you’re on a website where that’s part of the point).
Generally speaking, you should only sext women you have an established sexual connection with. In other words, she should either be an active sexual partner or someone with whom there’s a very strong likelihood that she’ll become a partner soon.
Even then, go easy. Start with subtle hints and suggestions as to how turned on you are and what you’d like to do to her. If she wants to hear more (or see a picture of it), she’ll be sure to let you know in no uncertain terms.
- Invest some energy into setting the tone.
Knowing you really need to establish a certain mood before you just go to town sending raunchy texts is one thing. Understanding how to go about it is another. Start by creating sexual tension playfully. Innuendo is always a great tool to use, as it can easily lead to a back and forth exchange between the two of you.
You can also look for ways to bring sex up in a way that’s not too forced or intimidating. For instance, if she texts you asking if you’d like to meet for drinks, you can always joke that she’s trying to get you drunk so she can take advantage of you later. If she’s responsive to the playfulness, go ahead and be a little bolder. It won’t be long before the conversation goes somewhere you’ll both really enjoy.
- Keep your face out of any pics you do send.
Here’s the thing. Women love to gossip. In fact, they’re as likely to chat up their friends in regards to any sexts they receive as a guy might be. For that reason, resist the temptation to prove that behemoth-sized cock is yours by including your
face. Keep in mind that sexting is actually illegal under certain circumstances. Not including your face is just smart thinking in case things go awry. You can just deny that it’s even you if it ever comes to that.
- Be tasteful about it.
Men may not be from Mars and women may not be from Venus, but it’s still important to note that there are difference between the two. Women absolutely do like looking at porn and seeing sexy things, but they don’t necessarily like it the same way men do.
Women aren’t as visual as men, so don’t expect to shoot her a picture of your hard cock with no context and have her instantly be turned on by it. A woman’s imagination plays a huge role in whether or not she finds something sexy. (One reason why sexy books like Fifty Shades of Grey so easily become best sellers!)
That said, use your words. Paint a picture of a scene she can’t resist wanting to be part of. She’s way more likely to be left wanting more if you describe a specific act in an artful way than if you send her a picture of it.
- Pay close attention to her responses.
As touched on above, it won’t take long at all for you to know whether or not she’s into it or not. After sending that first really suggestive sext, stop and wait. If she doesn’t respond (or responds unfavorably), don’t send another or push the issue. She’s probably not feeling it and doesn’t know what to say to you. Just let it go and move on.
Sexting Vocabulary 101: What to Say and What Not to Say
At this point, we’ve established that the key to turning a woman on with sexts is to appeal to her imagination. That means your choice of words is absolutely key… but which words are actually sexy? Which ones are almost always bombs? Let’s go over a few to keep in mind.
Do Say: “Inside You”
Want an easy way to avoid figuring out which word to use to refer to a woman’s naughty bits? Ready to get right to the heart of the matter? This is the way to do it. If a woman’s into you, she’ll think it’s smoking hot when you tell her how badly you want to be inside her.
Don’t Say: “Vagina”
There’s something about the word “vagina” that makes a woman feel like she’s back in sex ed class listening to a lecture on how to avoid HPV. Although lots of people make a good case for trying to reclaim this word, most women see it as just way too clinical to ever be sexy. Just stick with “pussy” if you need an actual word to use.
Don’t Say: “Boobs”
“Boobs” immediately makes a woman feel like she’s back in grade school and that’s the last thing you want if you’re trying to create a sexy mood. Just call them “tits”.
Do Say: “Dick” or “Cock”
If you’re wondering how you should refer to your member when sexting, either one of these totally works. You can also refer to how hard she’s making you. An interested woman loves nothing more than to hear all about the effect she has on you.
Don’t Say: “Penis”
Same reasons as “vagina”. This is just way too clinical for a conversation that’s supposed to be fun, flirty, and sexy.
As far as how to describe any actual acts you’re referring to, “fuck” is always a good one. Words like “cum”, “wet”, “suck”, “lick”, and so forth are all pretty solid choices as well. Steer clear of anything too immature or sophomoric-sounding. (Think “jizz”, “spooge”, “bang”, and the like.) If it sounds even vaguely like something you might have heard for the first time in the schoolyard as a child, leave it out of the equation.
How to Make Sure Your Pics Don’t Fall Flat
OK, so let’s say things actually do move along to the point where it’s time to send an actual pic. Maybe she outright asked for one. Maybe your instincts are just screaming that it’s a good move. Whatever the case may be, keep the following tips in mind.
- Consider sending a pic of your boner still inside your boxers. Remember – women like a little left to the imagination.
- Don’t even bother if it’s not actually hard. Most women do not find flaccid members even mildly sexy.
- Completely bare dicks go over best when the woman in question can look at it and think “I did that”. Keep that in mind.
- Keep things in the moment and send fresh pics. Don’t just reuse something she’s seen before. She will know the difference.
At the end of the day, really good sexting is possible and it isn’t rocket science either. It does take a little finesse and know-how though. Keep that knowledge at the forefront of your mind and it will be difficult to go wrong. Happy sexting!